Adventures of the Fellowship of the University of Adventuring School of Technology College

Quadruple the heads, quadruple teh phat lewt

Or, 'Huh, these dragon statues are actually coming in handy'

The party enters the door guarded by the cherub statues, and are instantly swarmed by undead. The scent of fleshmeat assaults the senses and partially gnawed human corpses are strewn about. A clay golem reaches out and uses a psychic probe on Thun-Thun, dazing him. Kiera reacts swiftly and looses a snapshot at a ghoul and a clay golem. (“Are we seriously fighting the Thing?”) Dire blasts away a skeletal archer and backs into a corner to give the tanks some room to maneuver. The skeletal spearmen swarm around Blandington, who sanctions them and uses his holy sword to reduce the bad anatomy lesson in front of him into bone dust. Thun-Thun avoids a grapple from a zombie as the golem uses a psychic thrust on Dire. Thun-Thun retaliates, swiping at the zombie and maneuvering behind it.

Davan takes out a skeleton as the ghoul moves up and hits Blandington hard. Kiera takes another couple shots at the ghoul and backs away. Dire gets hit with the golem’s psychic probe and is dazed. He retaliates with eyes of vestige. The skeleton too far away from Blandington dies due to sanction. The zombie swipes and Thun-Thun again but is too slow. Thun-Thun raises his mighty axe and cracks the skull of a swordsman, lightning arcing all about him and eliminating three other skeletons into ash floating on the wind.

Another zombie approaches and zombie grapples Blandington. He tries to escape by smiling winningly at the rotting corpse. It’s not very effective. Davan moves to flank and try to help Blandington out, but as he’s leaving the reach of the ghoul it immobilizes him. Kiera shoots down the zombie that has been bothering Thun-Thun and moves around to get a better shot at the ghoul. Dire releases an eldritch blast into the melee, hitting the zombie that has Blandington by the pauldrons. It lets go and Blandington pierces it with valorous smite, a beam of holy light blazing from his sword as the zombie returns to the underworld.

Thun-Thun breaks through the ghouls defenses, but there’s not much power behind his swing. Davan whirls his warhammer at the clay golem, smushing his torso. He shudders and begins to reform as Dire unleashes a burst of thunderous power at his face. Kiera snipes at the ghoul, taking it down. Blandington, Thun-Thun, and Davan all swarm the golem, and all that’s left is a puddle of tan goop.

Blandington happily takes the heads of the ghoul and golem for his shield. Davan squeezes through a tiny crack in the wall and discovers the remnants of previous adventurers. He loots the bodies and emerges with a FREAKING BAG OF HOLDING!

Kiera heads down the steps and opens the door at the end, revealing a gigantic arena with a door at the far end. A large lock keeps it sealed and there is a circular engraving in the exact center of the room. in each corner, an unlit brazier awaits. As Kiera starts trying to pick the lock and fails, there is a ‘whump’ noise and all four of the torches in the corners ignite and a rumbling comes from the pedestal in the middle. It raises up and a chimera rises from the depression. Kiera, with her intimate knowledge of all the beasts in the natural realms, warns the others that the beast has four heads. A lion body that can breath fire, and dragon head arcing with lightning, a ram head with power over frost, and a poisonous snake tail.

Blandington takes the lead, standing directly in front of the lion head and challenging it. The king of beasts looses a roiling gout of flame, setting the mighty paladin aflame. Davan smashes at the goat head as a cloud of frosty air begins to collect around its mouth. Thun-Thun steps in behind the beast to flank it, chopping at the snake head and attempting to avoid its sharp fangs. Kiera backs away into the corner and fires at the goat head, hoping to break its concentration. Dire also blasts at the goat and steps back into the western end of the arena. The air around the goat coalesces into a blast of frigid air that surrounds the beast, slowing Davan, Thun-Thun, and Blandington. The snake spits poison at Thun-Thun and Davan. Blandington attacks the lion again and manages to put out his flames. Davan moves over next to Thun-Thun and they both go for the snake tail. The goat looks at Kiera and spits out an orb of frost that starts floating toward her rapidly. The dragon head starts to stare up at the sky and hum, sparks arcing up and down its neck as unnatural storm clouds start brewing in the room everywhere but directly under the chimera.

Taking the hint, Kiera runs around the incoming orb and gets in melee range with the goat. Dire also moves in close to the dragon head. The dragon roars as a huge bolt of lightning arcs down, blasting the entirety of the arena. The orb from the goat loops back around and hits Kiera, immobilizing her and leaving a patch on the ground that slows anyone inside it.

Blandington laughs as the lions claws glance off his armor plating, then thrusts powerfully into its vulnerable mouth. Kiera fires her bow at the dragon, and the ram stabs her with his horns. She is unable to shake off the immobilization as the snake poisons Davan and Thun-Thun again. Thun-Thun strikes back at the snake and Dire backs off to shoot at the goat again. It goes limp, falling to the floor as the frost circle fades. Kiera shoots at the dragon again and shakes off the immobilization. Davan cleaves the snake head into the lion, and lets Kiera shift out of the range of the lions’ claws.

The three remaining heads lift up and scream at the sky, yellow light flooding from their mouths, and the goat head shudders and rises up with glowing golden eyes. Frost starts accumulating around its mouth again. Blandington, Thun-Thun, and Davan step back while Kiera and Dire focus on the dragon head. The goat releases another burst of cold, but it doesn’t hit anyone. Thun-Thun uses his second wind and Blandington touches himself. Davan uses his cast-iron stomach to save against his poisoning and cleaves the snake into the lion again. Dire and Kiera ignore the goat and focus on the dargon. It finally succumbs and drops to the ground. Before it can be revived, the party debates whether attacking the downed dragon head would still wound the chimera as a whole. Thun-Thun says “It’s like stabbing a sleeping hobo” and starts hacking away at the head on the ground while Davan keeps the snake busy.

Kiera switches focus to the lion, since Blandington and Thun-Thun are running low on HP. Blandington touches himself again and Thun-Thun chops away at the dragon head once more. As he does, the whole chimera starts writhing and all four heads roar at the ceiling with golden light shining from their eyes and mouths. Then it shudders, staggers a little, and drops to the ground, ded. Blandington starts dancing happily as he starts sawing away at the lion head to put it on his shield. Exhausted, the party decides to take a nap.

Will our party remember where they left their healer next week? Will the extra-dimensional properties of Blandington’s shield ever reach capacity? Will our party ever reach the boss fight against Kalerel? Find out next week, on DragonCast!!! THUN-THUN-THUN!!!!

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